so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
