She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
I wear drunk well.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize