hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
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