Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
