just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize
