her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Randomize
