I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
