You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Randomize
