There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
