When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Randomize
