Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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