they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
sarcasm needs its own font
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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