Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Randomize
