life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
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