weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Randomize
