Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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