I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
He shit in the fireplace
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
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