so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Randomize
