That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
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