Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize