Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
