If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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