You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
