do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
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