i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Randomize
