Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Watching her eat just hurts me
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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