I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize
