Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I need a burrito and a hug.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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