so explain again why im purple
no
Who wears a wallet chain?!
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Randomize
