Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
