What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
