He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I smell like Dick and happiness
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize