just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
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