What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
