You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhhâ€
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