Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
