I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
and you fell through a lawn chair
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