i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
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