Do vagina's smell?
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
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