im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Randomize
