And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Randomize
