South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
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