so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
