Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Randomize
