I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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