mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
Randomize
