That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
