Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize