So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
Randomize
