she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
