i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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